4 Simple Steps for Staying Calm and Collected No Matter What Life Throws at You

I’ve always been a pretty calm individual (just ask my mom about that time I nearly totaled my older sister’s car at 13 years old). Whether it’s having my already enormous workload doubled, having to make sense of a chaotic and disorganized situation or having to call my mom and explain why the police officer wants to talk to her, I’m the type of person that actually gets calmer with more stress.

It pains me to see that this is not the case for most people out there.

If you find yourself thrown into a tailspin every time something goes wrong, feel overwhelmed by life, unable to get a handle on things or just plain frazzled and stressed to the max… you’re in luck. Staying calm, collected and SANE, no matter what happens, is something that you can easily master with time and practice (and these four handy steps).

How to Stay Calm and Collected, No Matter What.

1) Take a time out.

I know it’s not easy when shit hits the fan, your workload triples and everything seems to be falling apart around you, but you MUST. CALM. DOWN. Take a deep breath. Close your eyes and sit in silence. Count backwards from 10. Stop moving. Stop speaking frantically and jumping all over the place. Just pause. You can do it, I promise. Taking a moment to calm yourself down makes all the difference in how you’ll handle (and tackle) the situation at hand.

2) Don’t succumb to negative thought patterns!

I can’t handle this.

This always happens to me.

Everything is awful and life sucks.

You know the thought patterns because they’re your “go to” in these types of situations. If you’re automatically throwing your hands in the air when thing’s start to go awry, you’re never going to get anywhere. Things will never change. You will always be stressed and miserable.

You have to work at changing your thought patterns.

You are 100% equipped and infinitely prepared to handle EVERYTHING that shows up in your life. Why? Because you are 100% responsible for what has happened and therefore, you’re 100% capable of changing things for good. It all begins with changing your reaction.

Repeat after me, “I CAN do this because I’m capable of handling whatever life throws at me.”

3) Get back in the present moment.

Whatever the issue, in order to tackle it you need to get back in the present moment and out of your head. When you’re stuck in your head, you’re going to overthink things, listen to your negative thoughts and fail to move forward in a positive direction.

Breathe. Shut out the negativity. GET PRESENT.

Focus on the task at hand, the first step, the call you have to make or the email you have to send. Do ONE thing at a time and you will instantly eliminate overwhelm. You will also manage to tackle the task with ease and grace and, before you know it, you’ll be on to the next thing.

4) TRUST. Know that everything will be okay.

I know that can be an annoying thing to hear when you’re at your wit’s end and your life feels like it’s falling apart, but you have to trust that everything will be okay. Think about the last time everything seemed to go wrong… are you still here? Still breathing and living your life? Are you, in THIS moment, okay? Yes, you are. And no matter what happens, you will still be okay, life will continue on and things will fall into place exactly as they’re supposed to.

I want to hear from you!

Share your insights, takeaways or “aha!” moments in the comments section below.
And if you have any tips for staying calm and collected, please share them as well!

PS – This post was inspired by both someone near and dear to me struggling with some serious overwhelm and Marie Forleo’s most recent Q&A Tuesday video blog!

Please take a moment to watch her video now!

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Related Posts: Stress Management


14 comments


  • _dznr

    very helpful stuff!

    June 14, 2011
  • MikeHardy

    This didn’t resonate with me at all. NO IDEA what you’re talking about…

    lol, great post honey, you hit it on the head!

    June 14, 2011
  • Stephenie Zamora

    @_dznr Glad you found it useful Jeff!

    June 14, 2011
  • Stephenie Zamora

    @MikeHardy ;) Thank you! xo

    June 14, 2011
  • NicoleSmootTengwall

    Yes, yes and YES! Until going through my divorce 2 years ago, I had a very cushy life. I was a stay at home mom to my 3 wonderful sons and could pretty much afford anything I needed. Well, to say that all did a 180 would be an understatement! It was the first time in my life that I had TRUE stress and I didn’t fare well for the first 6 months (although I did lose 30lbs in 2 months due…but NOT in a healthy way…in an “I can’t even put food in my mouth” way).

    I have since grown tremendously and I don’t feel so much like a victim anymore. Don’t get me wrong, it still sucks, but I realized that a lot of people have it way worse than me and I also started really taking inventory of all the amazing parts of my life and focusing on them.

    Starting my new business has been both terrifying and very liberating at the same time and has helped me to stay positive and have a goal.

    Thanks for the great post!

    June 15, 2011
  • creativekitty13

    These things are exactly what I try to do…especially that last one. Things WILL work out and will get better and I WILL be fine, so there’s no reason to fret about it. Take things as they come and roll with them… in the end it will give you life experience and character!

    June 15, 2011
  • Stephenie Zamora

    @creativekitty13 Hey Jen! LOVE your comment. “Take things as they come and roll with them… in the end it will give you life experience and character!” Such wise words! xo

    June 15, 2011
  • Stephenie Zamora

    @NicoleSmootTengwall Hi Nicole! I’m so sorry to hear that you went through such a rough time, but I AM glad to hear that you’ve since grown and that things are better. Gratitude is a HUGE part of the process. Learning to live in abundance rather than scarcity makes it easier to be positive and HAPPY with your life! Good luck in your business endeavors and let me know if I can help in any way! xo

    June 15, 2011
  • yourgreatlifetv

    HEY AWESOME Steph, Love #3 most of all. This is not just the secret to handle what you need to take care of in the best possible way but also the secret to living a truly fulfilling life. #4 is also a true gift anyone can give to themselves, the knowing that there is a purpose for everything and that in life there is always something waiting for you when things appear not to work out. Have a fantastic day :) Love -Bern

    June 15, 2011
  • LizLongacre

    You know what’s funny, I tend to get overwhelmed with the little things, but if there’s a crises, I’m a rock of stability. Life and death situation, I’m your girl. Daily to-do list, total stress & overwhelm ;) I guess with a big crises, I’m finally able to get out of my head. Working on correcting this!

    June 15, 2011
  • Stephenie Zamora

    @yourgreatlifetv Yes! You’re so right Bernardo. Appreciate you sharing your thoughts! xo

    June 15, 2011
  • Stephenie Zamora

    @LizLongacre Hahaha! I can see that. Yes, getting out of your head is the way to get things done! Tackle it one thing at a time! xo

    June 15, 2011
  • MalikMirza

    Very true and very well said Stephenie – Meditating a little bit really helps and that too, blended with faith and living in the present moment counts. I would like to share a very interesting book and a movie by Dan Milman called: The way of peacful warrior – it is all about having ‘peace’ when there is a ‘war’ going within. You may read my article from this link:

    http://wisdomfrombooks.com/how-can-we-have-inner-peace-the-way-of-a-peaceful-warrior/

    Thanks again for sharing

    regards

    Malik Mirza

    http://www.wisdomfrombooks.com

    June 15, 2011
  • Stephenie Zamora

    @MalikMirza Hi Malik, thank you again for the comment and resource! Meditation is awesome for learning how to be in the present moment. Appreciate you stopping by! :)

    June 15, 2011

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