Three Simple Steps to Increase Your Energy and Experience More Joy in Your Life!

You’re an energy based being, whether you’re aware of it or not. Your energy is effected by those around you, the weather, the planets and stars, noise, food and more. Everything and everyone in your life is created by and generates energy.

The most important thing to realize, is we all operate at a different frequency. We have different levels at which we can give and receive this energy. We’re unique, we’re sensitive and far too often we give away too much!

Think about it…

Have you ever been around someone who zaps the life out of you?

Have you every been completely overwhelmed by a space?

Have you ever packed your week so full that it leaves you wanting to cry?

If not then you may be a highly extroverted individual that just loves everything and everyone, all the time. That’s awesome, but this post isn’t for you. This post is for people who find themselves exhausted on a regular basis, overwhelmed by the people in their life or just plan scattered and frazzled. The people who can’t find the energy to do what they love, are constantly catering to everyone else’s needs and might even feel a little depressed or worn out by life.

If you feel these things, extroverted or introverted, you’re not honoring your energy.

How to Honor and Respect Your Energy

If you want to live a life filled with joy and passion, you have to learn how to respect and honor YOUR energy first and foremost. This is especially true if you’re introverted.

1. Know Yourself and Your Energy Cycle

We all have a cycle, men included, but especially women. There are times in your cycle that you feel energized, extroverted, social, fun and loud. These are the times you want to do everything and see everyone! Then there are also times when all you want to do is sit at home on the couch in your PJs and turn off your phone and email. You want to shut the world out.

Both ends of this spectrum are NORMAL. We all experience them, just to different degrees. It’s important to learn your cycle and begin to honor your energy patterns. If for three weeks you love to get out, socialize and experience the world, but for one week you wish you could just tuck away and not see anyone, honor that. If you’re the opposite and three weeks out of the month you like to be tucked away working on your own hobbies, but one week you love to be out on the town with your pals, honor it. If you fall somewhere in between or you have a very random and scattered pattern, HONOR IT.

There is no RIGHT cycle of energy. You don’t have to want to see people regularly or feel bad for taking time to yourself. In fact, you’re doing the people in your life a disservice by not honoring those times you don’t want to see them. If you take that space, you’ll feel more refreshed, happy and really enjoy your time together.

2. Use Your “Down and Out” Time to Recharge

Just the same as there’s no right or wrong energy cycle, there’s no right or wrong way to recharge. While you’re on the low end of your cycle, make sure to do the things that recharge and refresh you. Get a massage, watch cartoons for 7 hours straight, read a good book or just sleep. Maybe recharging your batteries is getting out and about, but by yourself or with a select person that always leaves you feeling envigorated.

Think about the things that refuel you! As you start to know and honor your cycle, you’ll be able to schedule these types of things on the days you know you’re going to need it. After a week jam packed with calls or socializing, I personally plan for a whole day of nothing. That’s right… no phone, no computer, no workouts, nothing. I literally sit on the couch all day and watch TV between naps. I follow that up with a fun day of being out and about doing things that refresh my mind and spirit. Thrift store, beach or a play date with energizing friends.

3. Cut Out Energy Drains

I don’t care if these are people, things or experiences… if it DRAINS your energy, it needs to go.

What’s the best way to tell if something or someone is an energy drain? When you begin to honor your cycle and have taken the time to recharge your batteries, something that’s draining will zap ALL that out almost instantly. If you come back from a two week vacation and are immediately stressed out, frustrated or exhausted by your job, it’s an energy drain. If you go out for a fun girl’s night only to feel upset or overwhelmed when you come home to your boyfriend, he’s an energy drain.

Sometimes these energy drains aren’t things we can just cut out right this instance, but once you acknowledge what they are, take responsibility and adjust the situation. Look for a better job, leave the relationship or try to find ways to improve the situation so that it’s no longer draining you.

Also, anyone that doesn’t honor and respect your energy cycle alongside you is an energy drain. People who push and pull you into situations despite you letting them know you need something else are not people who care about your needs and well-being.

Take Action Now!

I want you to begin tracking the following three things:

1. How social/extroverted/introverted am I feeling?
2. What is my energy level on a scale of 1 – 10?
3. What is my mood?

Ladies, track that menstrual cycle as well for even better results. EVERY day, I want you to quickly jot down your answers to these three questions. Get some fun stickers and use colored markers or highlighters so that you can easily see patterns at a glance. Really look to see what your cycle looks like and begin to plan accordingly!

BONUS! Click to download a free Energy Cycle Tracking Calendar PDF!

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What To Do When Your Skills Don’t Align With Your Passion

skill (noun):
1. The ability to do something well; expertise.
2. A particular ability.

So many of us get extremely caught up in doing the things we’re good at. Maybe it’s a trade we learned from our parents growing up… maybe it’s what we were directed to go to college for and we have a degree plus years of experience under our belt.

Regardless, it’s not our passion.
This realization can cause a lot of confusion and heartache.

But I spent ___ years and thousands of dollars going to school for this.

This is the only way I know how to make money.

The thing I love to do can’t be a REAL career.

Everyone says I’m so great at this, I would be a fool to change paths.

Here’s the truth about “what you do best”:
You were given these strengths and skill sets as TOOLS, not necessarily to build your life around.

I’m a prime example of this… my skills, experience and “expertise” are in design and branding. I went to school for it, worked at many firms and agencies, even built a business of my own around it! But it’s not my PASSION. My passion is personal responsibility and I’m driven by the desire to make a positive impact in the lives of others.

I tried to find a logical way to incorporate the two… only work with non-profits or companies that try to make a difference, but the fact of the matter is, I was just NOT passionate about design on it’s own. It’s a talent, one that I wasn’t entirely sure why I had, until I realized it was a tool to do far greater work in the world… and NOT necessarily in an obvious way.

Yes, I have the ability to create a beautiful and strong brand for everything I do… but my experience with branding also allows me to help people define their why, values and vision for life, then help them ensure all life areas are consistent with this vision. I’m able to see where people are out of alignment with what they claim to believe and desire in their life.

Let’s look at how you can do this with your life…

How to Connect Your Passion and Skills

1. Make a Transferable Skills List

The first step towards building a life around your passion, while incorporating your skills and strengths, is to take a look at how they integrate with one another. At first it can be incredibly difficult to make a connection… take my story as an example. How on earth does graphic design and personal development work together?

Start by making a list of all the skills that you’ve developed or honed as a result of your education, training and experience. Think of as MANY as possible. In my case, not only did I have all the skills and experience of design, I learned a TON about running a business, bookkeeping, customer service, working with vendors, pitching, sales, printing and so much more. I gained the tools necessary to build a SOLID business doing what I love and a different perspective on how to teach it to my audience. Additionally, my personal experience in building a life I didn’t love drives the work that I do for others.

Once you have your list, take a look and see what’s transferable to your passion. What skills can you use to build a career, business or life around what you REALLY love? Get creative, sometimes the answer is not always obvious or conventional.

2. Reframe Your Situation

Many times you may experience feelings of guilt or shame around the fact that you went to school, trained or spent years of your life following your skills, not your passion. Before you can move forward with what you love, you have to release those feelings and reframe the situation.

First of all, you would not have ended up doing whatever you’ve been doing without those natural skills and talents… there is a reason you spent time in the field you did and not another. Even if you were shoved into a profession that felt completely out of your skill set, you likely landed in a position that was fitting on some level.

Instead of viewing this as wasted time, work to see it as time spent honing your skills and talents in a different way. Having a unique perspective on how to do things will prove to be invaluable as you pursue your passion. No matter what you’ve been doing, it WILL serve you as you in the years to come. Look to positively reframe your situation constantly. There’s no sense wasting time in that negative space!

3. Dabble in Your Delights

Don’t think that because you spent years as a lawyer you can’t “waste time” painting. Or that you have no business building a life around working with kids when all you’ve done for the past decade of your life is crunch numbers and push papers.

You’re drawn to what you’re drawn to for a reason… don’t over think it! DO WHAT YOU LOVE. Do what you deeply desire to do. The things that light you up, fascinate you and feels right. Feelings should always win out over thoughts.

If you feel like you want to paint and be an artist… paint and be an artist. Don’t worry about the thoughts that tell you it’s silly, childish, random or a waste of time. Don’t THINK that you should be focusing on that big promotion when you don’t LOVE what you do. Put energy into what you love to do, not what you do because you can.

Take Action Now

Share with me at least one skill that you’ve honed doing whatever it is that you do that could be utilized if you follow your passion. If you’re not sure what you’re really passionate about yet, share with me one thing that you desire to do and how you plan to start incorporating it into your life THIS WEEK.

Pssst! If you’re ready to dig deep and take an honest look at your life, discover what you REALLY want and make an easy-to-implement action plan to make it happen FAST, then my digital program Foundations for Unshakable Joy is for you!

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Why You Didn’t Get What You Asked For

Have you ever really, REALLY wanted something? The perfect apartment, a great guy or new job? Maybe it was a trip with your friends to a tropical destination or a really awesome new tech gadget.

You told everyone that you had to have it… you prayed, wished, vision boarded and focused your intention on it… but it just didn’t happen. You fell short on cash, didn’t make it in time or something else threw a great big monkey wrench in the plan.

Before you get negative and think, “nothing ever works out for me,” you’re not alone!

While that can definitely be a bummer, there IS a reason.

Four Reasons You Didn’t Get What You Asked For

1. You weren’t specific enough.

For starters, the universe can’t deliver if it’s unclear on what you want.

“I need more money,” is not the same as, “I need $4,375.38 by March 1st.” Being specific also helps YOU get clarity on what you actually want. If you don’t know enough about what you desire, you can’t expect it to magically appear. Even if it did you wouldn’t know it!

When deciding what you want, whether it’s a soul mate, new job or material object, you HAVE to be as specific as possible. How much? What size? What color? By when? With who?

The more specific you can be, the more you’ll be able to envision and experience it before receiving. The power of mentally experiencing the essence of what you desire has major manifestation power.

2. You didn’t take ACTION.

Just the same as you can’t expect the pizza delivery guy to show up when you decide you want to eat, despite the fact that you didn’t feel like getting off your butt to make the phone call, you can’t expect the universe to do all the work for you.

If you want a glorious new position at a fabulous firm downtown, AWESOME. Place your specific order with the universe and then get to work. Find the perfect interview outfit, get you resume in tip top shape (or ditch it for something way more creative), start sending emails and making calls!

The universe works WITH you, not for you. Do your part!

3. It’s not in line with who you really are.

If you’re not in a place of true authenticity and honesty with yourself, then you’re not likely to get what you asked for. It’s all about energy.

If what you’re asking for is incongruent with who you are on a core level, whether you’re aware of it or not, you won’t receive it! OR, you’ll have to fight tooth and nail (massive action on your part – think pushing and pulling) to make it happen.

Take resistance from the universe as a sign that maybe you need to really re-evaluate your motives. Is it more about public image or meeting external expectations? Superficial attraction to someone who would NOT love and adore you? Attracting clients to do work that you really shouldn’t be doing?

Really take the time to check in with yourself on WHY you want what you’re asking for.

4. There is a much greater plan in the works.

Everything DOES happen for a reason! Sometimes the most amazing opportunities and experiences happen AFTER you miss out on the one you thought you wanted. The guy you’re dating skips out on you and the next day you meet Mr. Awesome. You get laid off from your job and the perfect opportunity to travel AND make money falls in your lap.

This doesn’t just happen in the movies. If you can move past that initial disappointment and stay open and receptive to what the universe has in store for you and you’ll see that amazing things begin to happen –- things you never would have considered for yourself!

Even if you fight hard for what you think you want, if it’s wrong, something will fall through… maybe not at first, maybe even a few years in… you WILL be nudged in the right direction.

Work on being open to the flow of life and save yourself time and energy!

Take Action Now!

Leave a comment below sharing one thing you asked for, desired or went after, but didn’t get. Can you find the gift in the situation? What happened afterward that you would have missed out on? How was it out of line with who you truly are? If you’re not sure and still feeling negative, say to yourself OUT LOUD and with loads of enthusiasm, “something AH-MAZING is about to happen and I am SO ready for it!!!”

Pssst! If you’re ready to dig deep and take an honest look at your life, discover what you REALLY want and make an easy-to-implement action plan to make it happen FAST, then my digital program Foundations for Unshakable Joy is for you!

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Yes, You DO Have a Purpose…

What the heck is purpose anyways?

To some, the word lights a fire in their belly because they truly understand what it means to live life with a purpose or calling. Others will cringe at the word… what a silly word, purpose. They doubt that everyone (including themselves) has a purpose or that things really do happen for a reason.

I believe that absolutely everything, including the awful, happens for a reason.

To enlighten us… or those we leave behind.

To force us to change our ways… a catalyst for growth.

To shape us into the people we’re meant to be… so that we can live our purpose.

You really do have a purpose, and it’s simply this:

Be you. Totally and completely. Fully expressed at ALL times.

When you’re just you, living that authentic self FULL OUT, it’s impossible to live a life off purpose. You do the things that you love and are skilled at. You spend time with the people you’re supposed to be with (because those who aren’t supposed to be in your life fall away). You travel to the places that you’re meant to be. And naturally, you begin to pursue your passions.

Ask yourself this:

If you didn’t have to please or worry about anyone else, what would you do? If money was no concern, how would you spend your time? Where would you be? With whom?

Don’t roll your eyes at these questions because you’ve heard them a million times… there’s a reason for that. It’s EYE-OPENING when you take the time to honestly look inside your heart to discover your truth.

Many times this questions is avoided out of FEAR. Fear that the life you have now isn’t the one you really want. Fear that the person you’re with, the friends or the tribe is actually steering you further from your truth. Fear that if you answer honestly, it will mean you have to DO SOMETHING about it.

Humor me… take some time with this question. Sit with it. Feel what bubbles up for you… what visions flash into your mind. Where your wildest fantasies take you. Discovering your truth requires honesty with yourself! And don’t worry, it doesn’t mean you have to throw everything away or start over.

Make an effort to simply know yourself and what you truly desire.

At a total loss?

Three simple ways to begin to discover your purpose:

1. Start following your tiny urges.

Do you really want to paint? Play guitar? Try some fancy new recipe? Have you been secretly dying to learn salsa or maybe even take a pole dancing class? Whatever your tiny little urge… indulge it. Take a class, buy the tools and try something that will begin to move you in the direction of what you REALLY want to do.

Nothing is too random, crazy or silly. If you have the urge, follow it! It will lead you into amazing new territory and allow you to get to know yourself on a deep level.

2. Be completely honest, ALL of the time.

Whether it’s with your friends, family or yourself, be totally honest about EVERYTHING. Don’t just agree with what everyone else is saying or doing. Don’t say you’ll do one thing when you really don’t want to or you’d rather do something else. Explore your truth.

Be honest with your words AND your actions… the purchases you make, clothes you chose to wear and things you decide to do. Your actions reflect your truth as strongly as your words. Begin to be honest and express that through everything you do.

Start small, but be confident in who you are and what you believe.

3. Realize you are the ONLY PERSON who knows what’s best.

Input can be phenomenal, but oftentimes we rely too heavily on our friends or family when making decisions. Before we know it, we don’t feel as if we can truly be ourselves because we’re so concerned about the approval of others. Don’t hand your power to someone else.

As much as they love you, these people’s assistance can sometimes hinder your ability to find and follow your purpose. They want only the best for you, and their actions can come from a place of protection… which is not always congruent with total support.

If you feel like something is right for you, then you need to trust your intuition!

Take action now!

Leave a comment below sharing some things you discovered about yourself when you honestly answered the questions above!

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” Howard Thurman

Pssst! If you’re ready to dig deep and take an honest look at your life, discover what you REALLY want and make an easy-to-implement action plan to make it happen FAST, then my new program Foundations for Unshakable Joy is for you!

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Guess What? You’re Not Supposed to Have it All Figured Out by Now!

Do you ever feel like you should be more experienced, further along or more on top of things in your life? That you should have an amazing career, the perfect husband and a clear sense of who you are and where you’re supposed to be? Worse, that you should already be there by now?

It’s time for a reality check.

You can only be who you are right now, in this moment, EXACTLY where you’re at. There’s nothing more to know. If you’re feeling discontent, stressed out or depressed, it’s not because you should be or have something other than what you have right now. It’s because you’re beating yourself up about what you’re lacking, rather than focusing on CREATING joy, fulfillment, passion and purpose in your life.

The truth about having it all figured out:

Where you thought you were “supposed to be by now” is irrelevant.

It was crafted by a younger, less experienced and not-here-right-now version of yourself. The only thing you’re supposed to have is this moment with whoever is here, wherever you are, as the person you are TODAY. How could you possibly have known what you “should” know today?

You had no idea what experiences, opportunities and personal transformations you would go through and how they would effect what you want in life. Feeling like you should be somewhere by now, when you’re clearly not “there,” should only tell you that maybe it’s NOT where you’re supposed to be.

When you’re on the right path, synchronicity is heightened and things feel easy. If you don’t feel that, chances are you’ve ventured down the wrong path and lost sight of what you REALLY want. Getting off course and feeling like you should be somewhere are clear signs that you’ve been working towards a life that is heavily influence by what others or society expect of you.

There will never be a point where you’ll have it all figured out. Ever.

Your life, personality, spirituality, knowledge and relationships are ALWAYS changing. You’re going to learn new things, discover new passions, meet new people and travel to new places… again and again, for the rest of your life. It’s impossible to ever have EVERYTHING figured out and there’s certainly no date by which you should. Stop putting pressure on yourself to get somewhere you can never reach.

Life is a learning process! Relationships, jobs, struggles, successes and everything in between are opportunities for spiritual growth. They give you a new perspective, tools or insights into who you really are and what you deeply desire. Everything and everyone around us is on this same journey, which makes it completely impossible to ever truly “figure it all out.”

The only thing that matters is who you are and what you desire RIGHT NOW.

It’s about incorporating more of what lights you up and less of what brings you down. What brings you JOY? What is your passion? Where do you find fulfillment, belly laughs and inspiration?

Unshakable joy, fulfillment and passion are produced by staying focused on what you really desire in your life right now. It also comes from knowing that “right now” is in constant flux. Regularly checking in with yourself is essential.

Take action now!

I want you to make a list of all the things you feel you should have, know or be by now. Take some time to consider where these beliefs came from. Your parents? Society? Internal expectations that stress you out always have an external source. Try to identify them.

Next, determine what’s really important to YOU. Use the following questions:

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