I Don’t Need You To Send Me Love I Need Your Practical Help

During the peak of my grief, a lot of people would “send love”. And while I understood the sentiment – after all, what do you say to someone who’s dealing with suicide loss around the holidays – and I understood the well-meaning behind those words… hearing them drove me crazy. Absolutely bonkers.  

I didn’t need the good vibes, I needed a shoulder to cry on. I didn’t need people to feel sorry for me, I needed help managing the day-to-day of my life. I didn’t need someone to tell me that time heals everything, I needed someone to force me to eat my breakfast and help me find a way to soothe the anxiety that was eating me alive.  

If a loved one of yours is going through a tough time, don’t just send them off with “some love” – find ways to help them get through the day. And if you are the one struggling, talk to people. Loudly and clearly. Say, “hey, I need to take care of xyz today, can you please help me?” I bet at least ONE person would come right away.

Communicate your needs… and even though life won’t get miraculously easy, it will get EASIER. And every small bit counts.