Never again will I apologize for my standards (or adjust them for others).
They’re high, yes, but that doesn’t make them wrong or unreasonable. It also doesn’t make them right or better.
It just makes them higher than most.
Very few people meet my standards anymore for friendship or partnership, and that’s okay. I have the most incredible, honest, caring, and conscious people in my world, and I would rather have one or two deeply aligned and supportive friendships than a ton of relationships that drag me down. I would rather be single than settle for something that’s just “good enough.”
No one gets to define our standards for us, and they certainly don’t get to make them wrong just because they can’t meet them.
To each their own.
I never mean or say, “you’re not good enough” to people, though they may hear that because of their core wounds. I always say, “this right here is a no for me,” with all the love in the world. Because if it’s good for them, then I want them to have it, and I’m not asking them to change to meet me where I’m at. But that doesn’t mean they’re for me, or I have to tolerate things that don’t feel aligned.
Having high standards usually means you’re clearer and have more boundaries than most people, which triggers those who have yet to gain that skill.
Plus, people take it personally when it’s not.
It’s not a reflection of them; it’s a reflection of who I am and what I want.
That’s neither good nor bad; it just is.
So raise your standards, friends. And do it unapologetically.
Don’t make other people wrong.
Just say “no, thank you” and move along with love.