When We Reach the Point of No Return


July 10, 2018

On these journeys we walk, there always comes a point of no return.

The moments where we say yes, lean in, take the leap, or make commitments and declarations in response to the invitation of our soul. We, by choice, begin the journey and start the process of stepping into what comes next. And then there are the moments where life happens in big, irreversible, “changes everything” ways, and we’re thrust into what’s next without any say on our part.

Many of my biggest journeys began by choice. Reluctant, terrified, and often uncertain choice, but choice nonetheless.

There was the time I was 20 years old and decided to end a very toxic and emotionally abusive relationship with my “high school sweetheart.”

My soul cried out that it wasn’t right—that there had to be something better—if only I could find the courage to leave. It took me some time, but I finally told him it was over, and that was the first step I took towards untangling myself from a life I was never built for in the first place. It was messy and hard… there was a court battle and property involved, and he made sure I paid for making that choice in ways that still impact me today. But I chose to trust the invitation of my soul and I have never once regretted that choice.

There was the time I was sitting on an airplane when I suddenly got the intuitive hit to move back to Colorado the following spring.

The voice was as clear as if the person sitting next to me had whispered in my ear, and the vision was visceral. I never wanted to leave Hawaii, and certainly not to go back to Colorado, but I trusted that voice enough to make the leap… which meant ending another relationship and moving myself and my business back across an ocean. It took time for me to understand why Colorado called me home, but I don’t know that I would have survived the years that followed had I not been here, and I have never been happier.

While many of my biggest journeys began by choice, the most recent one didn’t. Nope. It sucker punched me in the back of the head and brought me to my knees in the middle of a warm December night.

These moments of no return are key in Journey Mapping™. They’re the moments where a line is drawn in the sands of time separating “what came before” from “what comes next.” There’s no going back… because even once we return from the depths of the journey, we’re no longer the person we were before the moment of transition—we never will be again.

This is a beautiful truth… even though it doesn’t feel like it at the time.

It doesn’t feel like it because these moments are also where fear shows up. Fear tells us we’re wrong and everything is awful and if we don’t reverse our decision or go back, the entire world will explode and we’ll end up broke and homeless and alone until the end of time… you know how it goes.

But here’s the thing…
Fear is a liar.

Fear will tell you whatever it takes to change your mind. Fear will give you only the best memories and thoughts about the things you left behind. Fear will spool up stories about chaos and wreckage that isn’t real, that will never actually happen. And fear will tell you that you’re never going to be able to step into what comes next, because it’s far too scary and different or unfamiliar.

Don’t trust fear. Trust the you that made the decision. And if you didn’t have a say in the matter, trust yourself enough to navigate what comes next. You are far more capable than you give yourself credit for.

Keep coming back to that trust as many times as it takes. Transition and change are hard and scary. Trust and faith is everything for moving into what’s next… and the only way through is forward.



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