He Tried to Destroy Me

January 31, 2023

He tried to destroy me.

By his own words, that was his intention, and goodness if he didn’t have everything he needed to do that.

But he failed, utterly and spectacularly.

Instead of completely unraveling my sense of self, he activated an aspect of my soul that had been dormant for far too long. My fierce protector, a divine rage, and an unshakable steadiness and strength all rose up out of nowhere, catching me before I could even stumble slightly, let alone disappear into the depths of my darkness. And in the aftermath of those absurd experiences, everything about me and my life changed.

Every. Last. Thing.

I’m grateful for that experience, as crazy as it may sound. I’m grateful to him and all the ways he hurt my heart and challenged my spirit. Truly. I don’t believe healing and stepping into our purpose can only happen after traumatic and challenging experiences. Still, for me, at that particular point, I desperately needed to be jolted awake.

If it hadn’t happened how it happened, I wouldn’t be standing inside a story that expands my heart every day. I wouldn’t be clear on this evolution I’m called to birth to revolutionize the industry and change lives globally. I wouldn’t be as healthy, happy, strong, and aligned as I am.

Sometimes our awakenings are sweet and gentle, and sometimes they feel like getting smacked upside the head with a 2×4 from the universe. This experience knocked me on my @$$ so hard that everything still out of sync clicked back into place instantly. It took time to really settle into new ways of being and shift the trajectory of my life, but the internal transformation was remarkably apparent from the moment I said goodbye.

Today, I’m grateful.

Today, I’m stronger than I’ve ever been in my life while also softer and more surrendered.

Today, I’m open and trusting at levels I once felt were impossible to reach.

Today, I’m excited for all that’s coming, things that no one could anticipate and things that fill me up and bring immense joy.

We don’t need to be empowered to find our strength; we just need to remember that it’s there, then choose to reclaim it.

Because we never lost it.

And it’s always within reach.

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